Unbeknownst to me at the time, the posture displayed in this photograph spoke volumes.
Later that evening, I came to realize that I had made a terrible mistake. He exhibited a controlling nature by preventing my childhood friends, whom I considered like brothers, from hugging or kissing me on the cheek during the reception line. This not only embarrassed them but also offered me a glimpse into his manipulative behavior.
After our marriage, he dictated that I should refrain from wearing makeup, curling my hair, and insisted that I emulate my Missionary Sister. Despite working full-time to support him through school, he compelled me to decline a significant promotion simply because it required me to travel to New York twice a year. We were never able to visit friends since "he had to study." He forbade me from seeing my own mother on her birthday, even though she lived only ten minutes away.
Gradually, he isolated me from my loved ones, cutting off all ties with friends and family.
Had I seen this photograph on the day of our wedding instead of two months later in the photographer's proofs, I might have reconsidered my decision then and there. In fact, I attempted to back out before the wedding, but he convinced me that such thoughts were influenced by Satan, who sought to disrupt our union, recognizing the potential strength we possessed as a team dedicated to serving God.
He went on to become a minister, but he displayed little concern for the people in our church community. Whenever someone approached him with a problem or concern, he would talk over them, dismissing their issues. On our way home, I would express curiosity about the well-being of certain individuals, to which he would reply callously, "I spoke to them, and they're fine."
His behavior during Bible study infuriated the women present. After the initial greetings, he would stand up abruptly and loudly command, "Woman, be quiet!"
It became evident that his interest lay solely in the power and authority associated with being a minister, as he displayed a complete disregard for the welfare of our congregation, even referring to them disrespectfully as the "Stupid Sheep." It was at that point that I approached the minister of our parent church, emphasizing the urgent need to remove him from our church community, regardless of the consequences for our marriage.
To my surprise, some of the church elders contacted me, expressing their gratitude for taking a stand.
He proved to be mentally, emotionally, and sexually abusive. Fortunately, with the strength I eventually acquired, I managed to break free from his clutches. I am immensely grateful to have found the courage to leave.
Author : Patricia
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